IS THAT WHAT LOVE IS SUPPOSED TO FEEL LIKE?

Understanding Love, Why We Stay, and the Reasons We Choose Each Other

Gerald Crawford

CONTENTS

PART ONE — THE QUESTION

1. Is That What Love Is Supposed to Feel Like?
2. The First Time We Fall in Love
3. What We Were Taught About Love
4. The Difference Between Love and Need
5. When Love Feels Different
6. The Things We Mistake for Love
7. When Something Inside You Says, “This Isn’t Right”
8. The Courage to Ask the Question
9. What If We Have Been Getting Love Wrong?
10. Beginning the Journey

PART TWO — WHAT LOVE FEELS LIKE

1. Love Should Feel Safe
2. Love Should Feel Seen
3. Love Should Feel Heard
4. Love and Emotional Safety
5. Love and Vulnerability
6. Love and Trust
7. Love and Affection
8. Love and Belonging
9. Love and Freedom
10. When Love Hurts

PART THREE — THE LOVE WE LEARNED

1. Our First Understanding of Love
2. What Our Parents Taught Us
3. The Love We Received
4. The Love We Didn’t Receive
5. Childhood Wounds and Adult Love
6. Why We Repeat What We Know
7. The Fear of Abandonment
8. The Fear of Rejection
9. The Fear of Being Alone
10. Learning to Love Differently

PART FOUR — WHY WE STAY

1. The Reasons We Stay
2. Love
3. Hope
4. History
5. Children
6. Fear
7. Comfort
8. Guilt
9. Loneliness
10. The Life We Have Built
11. The Person We Remember
12. The Person We Hope They Will Become
13. When Staying Becomes a Choice
14. When Staying Becomes a Prison

PART FIVE — THE WHOLE PERSON

1. Seeing Beyond the Surface
2. The Beautiful Parts
3. The Broken Parts
4. The Imperfections
5. The Wounds
6. The Fears
7. The Dreams
8. The Things We Don’t Understand
9. Accepting Without Excusing
10. Forgiving Without Forgetting
11. Loving the Person, Not the Projection
12. When We Finally See Each Other

PART SIX — WHEN LOVE IS TESTED

1. Love During Conflict
2. Love During Disappointment
3. Love After Betrayal
4. Love When Trust Is Broken
5. Love When We Are Angry
6. Love When We Are Hurt
7. Love and Forgiveness
8. Love and Boundaries
9. Love and Accountability
10. Love and Change
11. When Love Has to Fight
12. When Love Has to Let Go

PART SEVEN — THE LOVE WE CHOOSE

1. Love Is a Choice
2. Choosing Each Other Again
3. The Decision to Stay
4. The Decision to Grow
5. The Decision to Listen
6. The Decision to Understand
7. The Decision to Forgive
8. The Decision to Be Vulnerable
9. The Decision to Protect the Relationship
10. The Decision to Become Better
11. Choosing Love When Feelings Change
12. The Reasons We Find to Stay

PART EIGHT — LOVING YOURSELF

1. The Person You Are When Nobody Is Watching
2. Learning to See Yourself
3. Self-Respect
4. Self-Worth
5. The Boundaries of Self-Love
6. Why We Accept What Hurts Us
7. The Fear of Being Alone
8. Becoming Whole
9. You Cannot Give What You Do Not Have
10. Learning to Love Yourself Again

PART NINE — WHAT LOVE IS SUPPOSED TO FEEL LIKE

1. Love Should Feel Like Home
2. Love Should Feel Like Freedom
3. Love Should Feel Like Truth
4. Love Should Feel Like Peace
5. Love Should Feel Like Being Chosen
6. Love Should Feel Like Being Known
7. Love Should Feel Like Becoming
8. Love Should Feel Like Two People, Not One
9. Love Should Feel Like a Choice
10. Love Should Feel Like Love

PART TEN — THE REASONS WE STAY

1. So, Is That What Love Is Supposed to Feel Like?
2. What We Now Know About Love
3. What We Are Willing to Give
4. What We Are Willing to Receive
5. What We Are Willing to Forgive
6. What We Are No Longer Willing to Accept
7. The Person We Choose
8. The Life We Choose
9. The Love We Choose
10. The Reasons We Stay